My Struggle  Stephanie A. Taylor       

 

 

Dealing with a mental illness is not the easiest thing in the world. However, there are many kinds of help such as medicine, psychologists, therapists, and hospitals. The help that is right for you really is not easy to find.

 

The first treatment starts with the person. If they are in denial, they can't be helped. Once people with mental illnesses realize they need assistance, that is when a little bit of sun light comes cuts through the fog.

 

I should know because I have major depression also known as clinical depression.

 

I've had it since I was 14 years old. My diagnosis was not until five years later. I was terrified because I did not want to be mentally ill. Two of my family members were put in mental institutions for long periods of time. I didn't want to be next. But I was admitted anyway. My stay was not long. It was only for five days. Those were the longest five days in my life.

 

There was nothing to do. I didn't have my sketch book and color pencils, head phones were not allowed and my favorite shows were on cable which means I could not watch them there. Plus, I missed my family. Even though they came to visit, it wasn't the same. They'd only stay for a few hours. Watching them leave and not being able to go with them was very painful. I was so home sick. But I needed help.

 

Now that I look back I'm glad I went there because my depression probably would've been worse. Staying there was a learning experience. I learned that it is not a disgrace to get in patient treatment.

 

Depression and other mental illnesses do not stop you from fulfilling your dreams.

 

It didn't stop me. I wanted to stay on my high school honor roll for four years. Another academic goal was to stay in the top half of the top ten. My number one choice for college was Columbia. Journalism was and still is my dream major.

 

These desires are accomplished. I was on the honor roll  during my whole high school experience. I was number three out of about 340 students. Columbia is where I'm currently enrolled with a major in journalism.

 

I also won many awards. I won three bronze medals in the 2000 Academic Decathlon. Awards were also received by me from J.R.O.T.C. My most treasured achievement is the Superior Cadet which is the highest honor in J.R.O.T.C.

 

I may have accomplished a lot, but my depression was pretty bad. My limbs felt weak and shaky. Getting out of bed was a battle. Crying was habitual. I couldn't walk out of one room without having to sit down. There were times when getting dressed was a huge challenge. During this rough time, my G.P.A. never fell under a 3.5.

 

When my college career first started I would beat myself up because I was not on the Dean's List. If I did not get at least a B on my papers, I would be highly disappointed.

 

In addition, getting out of bed was still hard to do. Dressing myself wasn't as big a challenge. I would barely eat. I felt empty and alone. I wasn't crying as much. My concentration was worse. Fortunately, I made it through the school year with a 2.9.

 

There is nothing worse than someone telling you what you can or can't do.

 

Depression is a medical condition. It's cause by a chemical imbalance. Depression and other mental illnesses can't stop you from fulfilling your dreams.

 

You are not alone. Millions have it. They have succeeded beyond the limits. Don't put limits on yourself.

 

Know your strengths and weaknesses but do not put weights on your abilities. Let them soar. You can and will make it.

Stephanie A. Taylor is a student enrolled in Columbia College, Chicago, who is seeking a Bachelor's Degree in journalism. She is currently working on her first book, which will be out in one to two years. Contact: stept@hotmail.com