I recently called a technical specialist at a large company to ask about that company’s quality program. As I began conversing with the man I contacted, I had to explain how little I knew about cosmetics quality and he began to explain in detail what he knew. It’s a common experience. Ask and you will learn. I keep finding how very open people are with what they know. It’s as if they are waiting to be asked about their special areas of expertise. The trick is, how do you ask your questions?

There are right ways and wrong ways to elicit information, so let’s begin with the wrong way. If you are not willing to know less than the person you are talking with, then there’s a substantial chance a kind of intellectual competition will begin. You say one thing and the other person responds with a little more information, and it goes back and forth. But what makes this competition escalate is that there’s an emotional component to the dialog. The information is exchanged to prove you know just a little more than the other person, and they resp ond for the same reason. You can feel it in your abdomen as you speak. It’s a tense feeling and whether you intend it or not, there’s a put down that accompanies each volley of the exchange. Sure you can cull a lot of information this way, but it always comes at a personal cost.

I started with the wrong way for one reason. It’s easy to repair this type of conversation by simply asking: can you help me? Even in the middle of a competitive conversation, you can always back down. The truth is, it’s not really backing down. It’s successfully redirecting the conversation so you get what you want and give the other person respect for their help. As I said at the beginning of this writing, I’m frequently amazed at the generosity of people when I simply give them the opportunity to be an expert. Once you get a person going on a subject they know about, you can continue to direct the conversation by interjecting more questions about the other things you want to know. You’re more in control than you realize when you simply ask for help.

Once you’ve mastered the ability to ask questions, you’ll have access to information that would be much harder to obtain on your own. Since a large part of career development is based on what you know, consider this humble method of information gathering one of the secret weapons of career growth.

This short article is a taste of what you’ll find in Workination: Are You Fascinated With Your Career by career development specialist, author and seminar leader Todd Royer. If you purchase this book on February 12, 2008, in addition to the book, Todd is offering bonuses to everyone who buys the book on that day – and for everyone who already bought a copy. Go to Todd Royer’s web site to purchase the book Feb. 12th or any day at: http://www.careervisionquarterly.com/books.html and click on the Amazon button. After the purchase, bonuses are at: http://www.careervisionquarterly.com/workination-bonuses.htm